Thursday, May 7, 2015

Palm Tree From Hell

The middle palm is the offender.  
I have been under the weather this past week.

Okay...well,  not really "under the weather."

More like I was attacked by the palm tree of death.

Do you know that palm trees can seriously f- you up?  I sure didn't.   I was blissfully ignorant of this danger.


Yea, sure; we live in Florida.

We had a bobcat walk through our backyard several years ago.  I didn't notice it, but when my (then) three-year-old started yelling about the "lion in the backyard," I quickly took notice.

We have bears.  There are bear crossing signs everywhere here, as there are deer crossings in Minnesota.

Since moving into this home five years ago, we have had three cotton mouth snakes in our yard, one behemoth in our street and one baby (eek!) in our house.

I will save the "in the house" incident to discuss at a later time.

So, I was gardening ~ as I usually do ~ without gloves.

A sylvestris palm poked my thumb as I was cutting it, and a small fragment was left behind.   I tried to squeeze it out.  I used tweezers and a sewing needle to no avail.

You hear that your body will "push out" the offending foreign object.   I possessed that hope for several days, because seriously, who wants to go to the doctor for sliver?  I didn't.

It became infected.  Then,  I had some sort of reaction to whatever venom/bacteria/fungus the death trap possessed.

The first emergency room visit focused on the swelling and streak moving up my arm.   I was put on Bactrim.

The second emergency room visit was concerning the insane stinging pain in my hand and joint.  And honestly, I wasn't 100% confident in the weird, semi-unprofessional emergency room experience the day before.  (I really, really hope they send me a survey.)

I was put on a second antibiotic.

The THIRD emergency room visit was because the redness was spreading and it was seriously freaking me.  The heck.  Out.

I was afraid that I would be that "Florida-Weird" story of a girl who was injured doing mundane yard work, and who ended up with her hand amputated.

During that third visit, the doctor lanced the wound because by that time it was an abscess.  She cleaned the wound out with a syringe.

I walked into the hospital with a fever.

I walked out with a normal temperature, and twelve hours later the wound looked a million times better.

It was pretty amazing.

I took away several lessons from this entire incident:

1.)  I will wear gloves while doing yard work.
2.)  I will be more careful while doing yard work.
3.)  I (probably) will not wear flip flops while doing yard work.
4.)  Palm trees are pretty but can hurt you.
5.)  I will not be a wallflower about a sliver.
6.)  I will definitely be more appreciative of my health.  It is amazing how something so seemingly             silly took me down so completely.

I am hoping that this week will be much more uneventful; that was enough drama for me.

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